296 Hot Dirty Pick Up Lines For You

Are you feeling courageous and adventurous in your search of love? Maybe you want to spice up your romantic interactions? Looking for a Tinder hookup? Look no farther than this post on the most offensive pick-up lines! While these lines may not be for the faint of heart, they can inject fun and flirtatiousness into your talks. They can be used to start a funny conversation with friends or to break the ice with new people. Use these dirty pick-up lines with caution, as anyone who is easily offended would not appreciate such comedy. From cheeky one-liners to brazen come-ons, we’ve created a list of the best dirty pick up lines to help you make an unforgettable first impression. So saddle up and prepare to dazzle with these clever and provocative pick-up lines!

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Clean Dirty Pick Up Lines

• That drink has too many calories, but I know a great way to burn them off.
• Love that dress, it would look much better on my floor though.
• Is it possible that you might be an elevator? I would happily go up and down on you.
• I love your shirt, can I try it on in the morning?
• You have the hot buns, I have the meat, let’s make a sandwich.
• If being sexy is a crime, then you are under arrest.
• Is there space in your mouth for another tongue?
• If I was a judge, I would give you the sex penalty.
• It’s almost thanksgiving, do you want to be the turkey and I can be the stuffing?
• You don’t have to do the walk of shame tomorrow, I drive!
• You must be a bowl of corn flakes, because I want to spoon you.
• That shirt looks hot on you, as would I.
• I lost my condom, do you have one we could use?
• Did you bring your umbrella? You can expect a snow storm tonight with me.
• Do you go to the gym? I know one workout that you’ve been missing.
• My doctor said I lack vitamin D, can you help give me it?
• What’s your name? I want to get it right when I shout it later.
• I have no interest in having kids, but can we practice anyways?
• Are you a pirate? I have a booty you might want to uncover.
• Are you a farmer? I have a rooster that needs silenced in the morning.
• Are you a plumber? I have a pipe that needs blocked.
• Are you a psychic? I have something down my trousers, but you already know what it is.
• Are you a magician? Can you make my boner disappear?
• Are you a personal trainer? I have one muscle that needs a lot of work.
• Are you a professor? I have a theory about sex that I need to test on someone.
• Are you a vet? I have a cat that needs examined.
• Are you a nurse? I have a throbbing sensation between my legs that needs looked at.
• I was having such an off day, but now you turned me on.
• Your body has 206 bones, you think you could handle another one?
• Seems like you sat on a big bag of sugar since you have such a sweet ass.
• Want to know how my muscles are so big? Picking up sexy ladies like you.
• Do you think Karma is not real? I know some karma-sutra that might change your mind.

Pick Up Lines for Flirting

• Let’s play Titanic. You’ll be the iceberg, and I’ll go down.
• I wanna put my thingy into your thingy.
• Excuse me, but does my tongue taste funny to you?
• I’m just like a pore strip. Hard to get off, but extremely satisfied once you do.
• Wanna share your side of the bed tonight?
• Those clothes would look great in a crumpled heap on my bedroom floor.
• I don’t think I want your babies, but I wouldn’t mind refining my baby-making technique with you.
• I just checked the weather report, and there’s a 95% chance you’re getting six inches tonight.
• You are just like a snowflake: beautiful, unique, and with one touch, you’ll be wet.
• You’re so sizzling! Can I let my volcano erupt inside you?
• Do you have an inhaler? You took my breath away.
• Are you a woodchuck? Because I can see your wood.
• Do you believe in karma? Because I know some good karma-sutra positions.
• Treat me like a pirate and give me that booty.
• I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bed rock.
• Let’s go to my place and do some math. Add a bed, subtract our clothes, divide your legs, and multiply.
• You’re just like a wine-tasting. They say to spit, but I always prefer swallowing.
• I hope you’re a plumber because you’ve got my pipe leaking.
• Did you sit in a pile of sugar? ‘Cause you have a pretty sweet ass.
• Are you a stack of dirty dishes? Because I want to get you wet and do you all night long.
• I think my allergies are acting up. Because every time you’re around I start swelling up.
• I’m like a Rubik’s Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get.
• What has 132 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.
• Want to see if you can add “has an awesome gag reflex” to your resume?
• My doctor told me I have a vitamin D deficiency. Want to go back to my place and fix that for me?
• I’m a bird watcher and I’m looking for a Big Breasted Bed Thrasher. Have you seen one?
• I’m not into watching sunsets, but I’d love to see you go down.
• I’m just like a pore strip. Hard to get off, but extremely satisfying once you do.

Pick Up Lines for Girls

• Are you a pie? Because I’d like a piece of you.
• Are you a parking ticket? Because you’re fine.
• Aside from being hot, what do you do for a living?
• Did you just come out of the oven? Because you’re burning hot.
• Are you a magnet? Because you’re doing a great job at attracting me.
• Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?
• You look cold, want to use me as a blanket?
• Dinner first, or should we go straight to dessert?
• Do you know how to stop, drop, and roll? Because baby, you’re on fire.
• Did you sit in a pile of sugar? Because you’re looking pretty sweet.
• Did it hurt when you fell from the vending machine? Because you’re looking like a snack.
• Sorry—were you talking to me? No? Would you like to?
• Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.
• Make out with me if I am wrong, but isn’t the Earth flat?
• Kiss me on the cheek if I am wrong, but fish can fly, right?
• I’m a mathematician, give me your number and I will show you how I divide and multiply later.
• Are you google? Because you are the first thing that came up when I typed “sexy horny single in your area!”
• Are you a tree surgeon? I have morning wood that needs dealt with.
• Aside from being extremely hot, what else do you do for a living?
• Did you escape from jail? Because it’s definitely illegal to look this good.

Cute Pick Up Lines

• People call me John, but you can call me tonight.
• Are you my phone charger? Because without you, I’d die.
• Hey! Are you garbage? I’ll take you out!
• Can I give you a hug to show you how soft my sweater is?
• I’m so lost. I was looking for your number.
• I’m new in town. Could you give me directions to your apartment?
• Sorry, but you owe me a drink. [Why?] Because when I looked at you, I dropped mine.
• If you were a potato, you’d be a sweet one.
• Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?
• I must be in a museum because you truly are a work of art.
• There must be something wrong with my eyes. I can’t take them off you.
• You spend so much time in my mind, I should charge you rent.
• Are you Australian? Because you meet all of my koala-fications.
• Is your name Chamomile? Because you look like a hot-tea.
• I feel like I’m getting a tan just standing here because you’re so scorching.
• Does my tongue taste funny to you?
• If you were a flower, you’d be a damn-delion.
• Does your name start with “C”? Because I can “C” us getting together tonight.
• Is it hot in here or is it just you?
• Do you have a shovel? Because I’m digging your look.
• Wanna help me get on Santa’s naughty list this year?
• Do I know you from somewhere? Oh, that’s right. My dreams.
• Hello. Cupid called. He wants to tell you he needs my heart back.
• Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?
• Life without you is like a broken pencil… pointless.
• Hey, tie your shoes! I don’t want you falling for anyone else.
• I’ll give up my morning cereal to spoon you instead.
• What has 36 teeth and holds back the Incredible Hulk? My zipper.
• If you were a steak, you would be well done.
• Hello, I’m a thief, and I’m here to steal your heart.
• Are you cake? Cause I want a piece of that.
• Are you a beaver? Cause daaaaaaaaam!
• Do you know karate? Because your body is really kickin’.
• Hey! My name is Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?
• Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.
• Do you like action movies? Because you’re giving me Jean Claud Van Daaaaaaaam vibes.
• I went to Alabama for college. Want to Roll Tide Roll with me?
• If you were a library book, I would check you out.
• Are you a cat because I’m feline a connection between us!
• If nothing lasts forever, will you be my nothing?
• My lips are like Skittles. Wanna taste the rainbow?
• Is your daddy a drug dealer? Because I think you look dope.
• You’re like pizza. Even when you’re bad, you’re good.
• I may not be a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.
• Do you like coffee? Because I like you a latte.
• Do you feel sick? Because I think you’re suffering from a lack of vitamin Me.
• I volunteer as your victim tonight since you’re clearly dressed to kill.
• Your lips look lonely. How about I introduce them to mine?
• Toss me your car keys so I can drive you crazy.
• Are you the syllabus? Because I have been studying you like crazy.
• You’re so hot, you make the equator look like the North Pole.
• Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
• If being sexy was a crime, you’d be guilty as charged.
• I’ve been feeling a little lifeless lately—would you give me mouth-to-mouth?
• I watched a documentary that said lips are the most sensitive part of the body, wanna find out if that’s true?
• If you were a transformer, you’d be a HOT-obot, and your name would be Optimus Fine.
• Are you from Tennessee? Because you’re the only 10 I see!

Smooth Pick Up Lines

• You’re on my list of things to do tonight.
• Can I borrow a kiss? I promise I’ll give it back.
• I want you to be the girl who takes my virginity.
• If I was the judge, I’d sentence you to my bed.
• I’m having trouble sleeping by myself. Will you stay with me tonight?
• I’ll show you my tan lines if you’ll show me yours.
• I’m an adventurer and I want to explore you.
• I know you’re busy today, but can you add me to your to-do list?
• That’s a beautiful smile, but it’d look even better if it were all you were wearing.
• Excuse me, but does my tongue taste funny to you?
• Do I have to sign for your package?
• Want to see a movie or do you want to make one?
• I may not go down in history, but I’ll go down on you.
• I’m not a weatherman, but you can expect a few more inches tonight.
• You look so good; I wanna kiss your lips and then move up toward your belly button.
• Give me your car keys so I can drive you crazy.
• Nice dress. Can I talk you out of it?
• What is a nice person like you doing in a dirty mind like mine?
• Pizza is my second favorite thing to eat in bed.
• If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
• Make out with me if I am wrong, but isn’t the Earth flat?
• I think I could fall madly in bed with you.
• I’ll kiss you in the rain so you get twice as wet.
• Don’t ever change. Just get naked.
• Wanna share your side of the bed tonight?
• Want to go halves on a baby?
• Hey, may I use your thighs as earmuffs?
• Your hand looks heavy. I can hold it for you!
• Can you tell me what time your legs open, please?
• I love your shirt, can I try it on in the morning?
• Twinkle twinkle, little star, let’s make love in my car.

Dirty Pick Up Lines for Her

• “Don’t forget my name because you’ll be screaming it tonight.”
• “Can I help loosen your belt? It looks really tight.”
• “Would you mind a happy death? Because people say sex is a killer.”
• “Your sweater is made of 100% boyfriend material. It looks great on you.”
• “Hey, what’s your name? I need to know what I’ll be screaming tonight.”
• “Well, hey there! I sure don’t need a spoonful of sugar to swallow you.”
• “You’re beautiful” has U in it, but “quickie” has U and I together.”
• “I might be a light switch because I look at you, and I get turned on.”
• “You’re so hot, I bet you could light a candle at 10 paces.”
• “I’m not a weatherman, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.”
• “You remind me of a magnet because you sure are attracting me over here.”

Dirty Pick Up Lines to Say to a Guy

• “Would you like to go out to dinner sometime, or should we go to my room and skip right to dessert?”
• “Do you mind if I finish the cherry on top?”
• “I’m not a genie, but I can make your dreams come true.”
• “I’m not a photographer, but I can definitely picture us together.”
• “I’m not wearing any underwear. Can I offer you a seat?”
• “Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.”
• “Kiss me if I’m wrong, but dinosaurs still exist, right?”
• “I’m not a mathematician, but I think we’re a perfect match.”
• “Do you have a Band-Aid? I just scraped my knee falling for you.”
• “Only two things can wake up my senses: you and coffee!”
• “If you were a fruit, you’d be a fineapple.”

Funny Dirty Up Pick Lines

• “Are you a magician? Because whenever I look at you, everyone else disappears.”
• “Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?”
• “If you were a vegetable, you’d be a cute-cumber.”
• “Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?”
• “Is your name Google? Because you have everything I’ve been searching for.”
• “Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?”
• “Do you have a library card? Because I am checking you out.”
• “Are you a camera? Because every time I look at you, I smile.”
• “I tried my best not to feel anything for you. I tried and failed.”
• “What time do you need to be back in Heaven?”
• “You better call Life Alert because I have fallen and can’t get up.”

Seductive Pick Up Lines

• “You’re so hot, my zipper is falling for you.”
• “They say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?”
• “Sorry to bother you, but— do you have room for an extra tongue in your mouth?”
• “Do you have a map? I keep getting lost in your eyes.”
• “How do you want your eggs? Poached, scrambled, or fertilized?”
• “I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.”
• “Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m inside you.”
• “There’s only one thing I want to change about you, and that’s your last name.”
• “Baby, I’m no Fred Flintstone, but I can make your Bedrock!”
• “Are you going to kiss me, or do I have to lie to my diary?”
• “Do I know you? Cause you look exactly like my next girlfriend.”

Sexy Pick Up Lines

• “I must be a snowflake because I’ve fallen for you.”
• “You look cold. Want to use me as a blanket?”
• “Are you a hipster? Because you make my hips stir.”
• “You look like a cool glass of refreshing water, and I am the thirstiest man in the world.”
• “This isn’t a beer belly. It’s a fuel tank for a love machine.”
• “Are you an omelette? Because you’re making me egg-cited!”
• “Do you work at Dick’s? Cause you’re sporting the goods.”
• “Are you cold? You look like you could use some hot chocolate… Well, here I am!”
• “I need a dollar, but I only have 90 cents… do you want to be my dime?”
• “Let me tie your shoes ‘cause I don’t want you falling for anyone else.”
• “Are you Hurricane Katrina? Cause you’re blowing me away.”

Freaky Pick Up Lines

• “If I buy you dinner, will you be the dessert?”
• “My name isn’t Elmo, but you can tickle me any time you want to.”
• “What’s on the menu? Me-n-U”
• “Your lips look so lonely… Would they like to meet mine?”
• “I play the field, and it looks like I just hit a home run with you.”
• “I know milk does a body good, but baby, how much have you been drinking?”
• “Baby, I might not be Sriracha sauce, but I sure will spice up your life.”
• “Wanna go bowling? I thought it might be right up your alley.”
• “Is your car battery dead? Because I’d like to jump you.”
• “Do you like Mexican food? Cause I want to wrap you in my arms and make you my BAE-RITTO.”
• “If you were a steak, you would be well done.”

Naughty Pick Up Lines

• “Excuse me, but I think you dropped something: my jaw.”
• “Hi, my name is Doug. That’s ‘god’ spelled backward, with a little bit of you wrapped up in it.”
• “Do you have a name, or can I call you mine?”
• “I’m not saying you’re the best catch out there, but you’re definitely a catch worth keeping.”
• “I wish you were soap so I could feel you all over me.”
• “Let only latex stand between us.”
• “Are you winter? Because you will be coming soon.”
• “Do you have any sunscreen? ‘Cause you are burning me up!”
• “Is your father Little Caesar? Cause you look Hot ‘n Ready.”
• “I could lay next to you forever… or until we decide to go eat.”
• “Your body is a wonderland, and I’d like to be Alice.”
• “You spend so much time in my mind. I should charge you rent.

Dirty Pick Up Lines for Text Messaging

• “Do you believe in love at first text, or should I type “hi” again?”
• “I don’t like sitting here at work when I could be at home doing filthy things to you.”
• “I want to kiss my way from your lips down slowly…the only question is how far down will I go?”
• “Let’s make music on my sheets.”
• “Hey, guy, what size are you? My mouth would be the perfect fit.”
• “I’m no weatherman, but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.”
• “I’ve got something special in the sack for you!”
• “You are so sexy. You turn my pickle into a fresh cucumber.”
• “You’re just like a snowflake: Beautiful, unique, and with one touch, you’ll be wet.”
• “You can be my chocolate bunny. I’ll start by nibbling on your ears and save the rest for last.”
• “There’s a cold front coming… but I’m gonna keep your front warm.”

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